Thursday, December 29, 2011

Change Me 2012

Change seems to be falling from the sky. I let it crash upon me without dodging. There is no time to ask for more time. Today is here. Yesterday is buried. All the yesterdays made a circle of 365 that tic toced away until before I realized I was standing in the exact place I had when the clock struck 12 last year. But I wasn't the same. Things aren't the same. Change fell. I let it fall on me. But I stand here feeling childish, like a school girl going to her first class for the first time. I felt, I had not grown. Time moved. I watched it, but I didn't move with it. Was it fatigue or was it fear? I can't tell. But my long sock are as higher in spirits than me.
The year felt shorter than my skirt, yet ballooned to exaggerate and falsify more .

I watched the days like a movie. Seeing the characters, me, play their part and only being able to watch. There is only one show playing, my life, and I can't do much more but watch and wait for a change in scene. Change is coming. I talk  back to the show, wishing the characters could hear me, the way you yell out during a horror flick "don't go into the basement." It's like when you cover your eyes at the scary parts, but behind your shut eyes you can still see everything that is happening. The show plays on whether you want to watch or not. The show doesn't end it simply changes. New roles, new lessons, new feelings, but the same show.

I try to kick away the school girl feelings. "Grow up" I say, "grow." Time is moving and you're still at the same place. My height is tall; my courage measures short. I still close my eyes at the scary parts. And like a backward Cinderella, I expect everything the be different at the stroke of 12. As if everything will be fairytale happy after screaming out New Year cheers. It won't. Like Cinderella things will go back to the same, unless I make a change. There will be change. Change is already falling and I'm not moving out of it's way. Come forth my tomorrow, my new year. Give me new lessons, new moments, something new. Give me change.

Check shirt: thrifted
Tie: thrift
Vest: Smart Set
Skirt:Urban Behavior
Knit Socks: Unknown
Heels: thrift

xox followers and readers.  Thanks for stopping  by

Sunday, December 18, 2011

We are wind and shadow

Every living man is no more than a puff of wind, no more than a shadow. All he does is for nothing. He gathers wealth but does not know who will get it. 
What then can I hope for, LORD? I put my hope in you.

Tout homme vivant n'est plus qu'un souffle de vent, plus qu'une ombre. Tout ce qu'il fait est pour rien. Il rassemble des richesses, mais ne sait pas qui va l'obtenir.

Que puis-je espérer, LORD? J'ai mis mon espoir en vous.

Thursday, December 15, 2011

And Then We Ate

This diner is close to my home but it was the first time I went there. I was pleased. The service was good. They have a pretty good assortment of options and it is fulfilling. I am rarely full when I eat out but I was forcing myself to finish my burger and fries.

Inside Bag
Pouring rootbeer in a rootbeer mug, because it's cheaper to buy a whole bottle than the drink you purchase with the meal. 
Fat Burger Crispy Chicken Sandwich. My sister's order. I had a bite and it was delicious.
My order: The Original Fat Burger. My sister and I shared some fries. I like how I got choose my toppings. 
President's Choice Red Velvet Cake Ice Cream. An incredible treat. It has cake pieces but isn't too sweet. The ice cream is creamy. 

Some fake bubbly to celebrate my sister's birthday. It was apple flavor I think.

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Past meets Present: Retro digital camera fujifilmx100

A photographer I am  not. I won't make any pretense about being some artistic point and shoot master that lives for a great pic. I pull my camera out now and then mostly to have a picture to add to my posts on this blog. But I do love cameras--not to use but to collect. I also have a thing for innovative items that merge decades either in terms of use, style, or both. Fujiflim made a camera after my own heart when they released the fujifilmx100. Allow me one childish outburst: I Want This Camera!

I'm not going to post a lengthy description about it's features and specs. I'm more interested in the fact that this digital camera looks like it stepped out of the 1970's film camera era. If I was a photographer I'd be snapping shots every second with this beauty.

According to

The classically inspired Fujifilm X100 has been globally recognized, picking up TIPA, EISA, iF Design and Red Dot awards for its premium design and technology. The Fuji X100 marries the highest calibre Fujinon lens with a custom APS-C CMOS sensor and the latest EXR image processing technology to deliver ultimate image quality. The unique Hybrid Viewfinder combines the clear, sharp view of an optical viewfinder with an electronic display. Control the shutter speed, aperture, ISO and exposure compensation with the manual dial and controls and explore your creative side. With the FinePix X100, you'll fall in love with photography all over again.

The cost is way out of my budget (1,199.99) though one may be able to find it cheaper on ebay. It is definitely a camera for those who like to bring a bit of the past into the present.

Monday, December 12, 2011

Moments from my day. Dec 12, 11

I had a day that was in between relaxing and productive. Bathing with Golden Wonders (lush bath bomb) was bliss. The aroma was festive and fun. I didn't finish the story in the British Mysteries book, so I hope to revisit that later. Unsure of what to wear, I combined a skirt from Urban Behavior ( I keep thinking it's from forever21) with some thifted items and lounged around for a while after writing some more of my paper.

Sunday, December 11, 2011

Snowy Salutations

As if they were happy to see me, snow flakes kissed me and swirled around encouraging me to stay awhile and play. My mother, being cautious, thought it would be a better idea for me to stay in and take the magic of winter from behind a window.

Usually I fear the cold, but I felt a kind of oneness with the season while standing out there. A magic was blossoming the same way flowers do in spring. I felt in awe that months prior my lawn was covered with greenage and now cold, wet, white heaped upon itself on the ground.

Seasons teach me that there is beauty in every stage of life. That not everything has to be bursting with life like summer to be considered beautiful.

Seasons teach me to accept change. No matter what, life progresses and nothing stays the same. This is a good thing; it's a beautiful thing, and it's something worth living for.

When the last snow flake of the season has kissed my cheek, spring will make its entrance. Until then, I will enjoy the season the same way I will enjoy each stage of my life.

Dress: H&M
Cardigan: H&M
Gloves: Navis Castle on Etsy
Purse: Garage Sale

Sunday, December 4, 2011

December Dreams

I woke up with a pounding in my heart
a pounding in my heart to let day start
I found the courage to shake of the dust
shake of the dust and learn to trust 

I whispered kindly to the snow
whispered to the snow to let my heart grow 
Let me twirl in winter's mirth
twirl in the mirth until spring's rebirth

The snow said clearly
  said clearly to me, laugh and love for you are free
In that blanket of white
  blanket of white I let my December dreams ignite

Dress: H&M
Sweater: Thrifted
Gloves: Navi's Castle
Boots: Thrifted
Necklace: Tiffany's
Tights: Ardene